All posts by hamishcraig

July Poetry: a misplaced sofa

All her life 
	she felt 
	like she was abstaining from 
	something.
the adult magazine 
	that stood
	readily available at
her local supermarket
had almost guaranteed her 
moralistic downfall.
She was young,
	too young,
	but she remembered how 
	she’d felt.
Perhaps she would have forgotten
had it not been for her 
parents shouting,
cold brother,
constant slamming doors.
Every day there seemed to 
be a ‘who could be the loudest’
contest at her
	house.
it was too disorderly to be called 
	a home,
although it lay host to a whole
	heap of problems 
		that imbedded 
	themselves in 
the purple dining room walls
and tht horrible 
green sofa that 
her grandma had 
left behind.
It seemed so out
	of place in the context
	that surrounded 
it
but still she felt 
like the sofa 
had more of a place 
in the mother’s heart 
than she ever could.
Perhaps that’s why she 
never took to it
like a new born baby
sucks all the attention
away from the older 
sibling.
It wasn’t even comfortable,
that was the worst part.

July Poetry: the moon that smiled

I hadn't seen a smile like that before,
Not round these parts,
It felt like something familiar.
What's worse was I never saw it again.
I never felt it again.
Not in that way at least.
It didn't bother me though,
At least I knew that feeling was out there somewhere on this earth.
Like how you can see the moon,
but will never experience it up close.
Appreciating how it makes the dark
slightly less scary
but will never get a chance to truly say thank you.
That was her smile,
A memory I would reflect on 
whilst walking the streets,
whilst in the shower,
whilst carrying out the mundane tasks of life.
That's when I remembered.
That's why I'm glad,
I saw her smile.
Even if it was just that one time. 

Throwback Poem: Walking [06.21]

Today I enjoyed walking 
The slowness of it
Giving me time I needed
Even wanted.
The surroundings help
People walking by help
Not literally
But like characters in a movie
Other stories in motion
Most likely never engaging with one another
At least not in my case.
I don't mind,
I make friends with the buildings I pass
And the song in my head.
They're company enough.

July poetry: a cities people

Sirens scream past
like and ice cream van
looking for the spark in
children's eyes
when he hands them
over a sense of joy
packaged in a pyramid
of cold, sugary bliss.

Birds carve the skies above
like the butcher artfully,
following lines in the dead animal,
lay in front of him.
It's blood
a river
flowing off the wooden workbench
full of etchings
that falsely portray
the presence of nature,
yet only reveal the use of a
cold,
sharp, metal blade.

A taxi cab,
turns off its glowing sign,
telling the world
it is once again full of purpose
although the sigh from the
driver would suggest otherwise.
A life long education
of street names and landmarks
makes him the closest thing
to the City,
not the men in suits who sit
in powerful huts
and navigate their post code
pretending to do good.

A chef wipes his hands after another shift being done.
He spent most of his day
in one spot, one location,
hesitant to break from his role
whilst
tomatoes from Cornwall,
truffles from Italy,
cuts of meat from Argentina,
all passed underneath his own very nose.
He would have the world at his
fingertips,
although his feet refused to move
more than 5 meters away,
the occasional pause to
fill his lungs with smoke.
The ingredients in his kitchen
were forever at his mercy
yet they were more well-travelled
than him.

July Poetry: why passion?

why do I get teary when I eat good food?
why do I get emotional when I hear a wonderful piece of music?
why do I get overwhelmed when I see something beautiful take place on the screen before me?
passion.
simply put, passion.
that glimpse into someone’s soul.
a snapshot of their most
ideal self.
their best creation.
where body, mind and countless of hours honing in that skill comes into
play.
into fruition.
it lays before you in whatever form
it belongs to.
it says 
“here I am”
“this is me”
all at once 
in a nicely packaged,
consumable form.
if the person on the receiving end
has the capacity to admire the beauty that lays before them,
then that results in something
equally as profound.
acknowledgement.
a response
“I see you”
we say back.
not directly.
more often than not, 
through a lack of words.
	              sometimes we miss this.
    we walk past it.
a man playing a violin in the underground,
we catch the distinct smell of an extravagant dish,
we aren’t present enough,
to acknowledge its beauty.
and that’s okay.
the world is full of missed opportunities,
just make sure that when you 
feel it,
that overwhelming,
profound beauty,
just sit with it.
let it stir inside of you,
let it draw out any emotions that
it so chooses.
          surrender to it.
                     or choose a life without it.

Check out my last poem here!

London Underground Fiction: “Please, mind the gap”

The doors slammed shut. He had only just made it onto the Circle line. He liked cutting things fine, it added to the excitement. Up till now, his life had seemed like a race. Everyone always banged on about ‘life’s a marathon this’ and ‘life is about finding your pace that’, but not from his experience. Since he’d left Primary school, he always felt like he was running against something. It wasn’t like he was competing with anyone, not anyone he knew at least. When you’re in first place however, you cannot see the people behind you. That’s how he looked at it. So even if he was racing against someone, he would never have known about it.

This was true of much of his life apart from where he was now. Since moving to London he had felt inner peace like never before. This was strange as most people had warned him about the soulless plights and people of the city. How everyone lived so close to one another, yet each person inhabited there own world. He’d often try and bump into people walking the streets to see if he could shake them from out their trance, an almost plea for some form of emotional response. He’d found that the more formal they were dressed, the less likely they were to react. Why was this he wondered. Was it the self confidence or emotional control that these people owned? Maybe it was the clothes that gave them this sense of control. No, it was neither of those things. It was that they were so far entrenched by the game, the chase of the city, the pecking order, that they dare not break free the from the course. To do so would show their weakness, to do so would reveal that they weren’t cut out for the top. The suit and tie would only provide so much of a disguise for the city that watched overhead.  Once he figured out who would crack and who wouldn’t, the game got boring to him, so he stopped playing.

He tried other ways to understand the people of this bustling place. Eventually he discovered the dynamics of the city’s underworld. He wasn’t referring to the any form of illegal happenings, the gangsters or the elite circles that would often delve into the underbelly of morality in the city’s dark corners. No, he knew nothing of that world and wanted to keep it that way. The world’s wrongs were clear enough in the daytime. The underworld to him was the cities transport system. The underground, a place, a system, a symbol that you would have heard of before ever stepping foot in London. Everyone talked down on it. How expensive it was or how no one was allowed to talk to anyone whilst on it. He’d always thought that strange. Perhaps everyone was paying their respects to the world below. Seeing as we buried our dead underground, we felt the need to acknowledge their silence with our own. Mouths shut but our eyes wide open, the only difference between us and those who lay dormant below.

He was not a fan of this silence, although most of the lines were poorly built and screeched as the tube scuttled across the tracks. He often wondered if this was done on purpose, to include this harrowing noise so that people would not attempt to talk over it. Either way, he enjoyed the glimpses of silence which allowed him to observe the various people in his carriage. There were those who read their newspapers, wearing suits from a bygone era, often adorned with a flamboyant pocket handkerchief. You would see these people few and far between which made them all the more enjoyable to observe. London was in their blood at this point. Not the London that most people knew, yet the one that they read about in books or had seen in films. They existed at the upper echelons of the city, the champagne socialists, the old money folk that would carry their old archaic way of thinking around with them like the newspaper they’d just unfurled from underneath their arm. Then you would have the finance crowd. You could tell which one was wealthier by the ratio between their grey hair and how youthful they looked. The ones who were the most successful often had more of a glow to them. This would have been a tell-tale sign of the good food they ate and the quality of wine that they drank. Were the sundried tomatoes they consumed coming from a small town in Italy or were they shipped over from an industrial farm in Morocco. These things mattered to them, and it showed.

There was one point where it was easier to distinguish between the people on board the tube down to the type of phones they were using. The old money folk would not bother with one whilst the businessman would walk around with a Bluetooth earpiece. Not anymore, today’s world everyone carried the same phone, everyone’s pockets were equal but that was about it when it came to a level playing field.

Some of the most intelligent people had been on the tube. Some of the best writers. Some of the best mathematicians. It was after all the quickest way of traversing the city. People would come down from all sorts of levels to get on the tube. No matter if you were working on the shop floor or a corner office on the eleventh floor, ultimately you were sardined next to one another during rush hour. This was more than a form of transport, this was a reminder from a higher power, a way of humbling the people of the city who would get carried away by their office view, their lunchtime expenses or their companies share buying schemes. One minute you would be closing a multi-million-pound deal and the next you’d be smelling the armpit of a PT who had just finished training their last client for the day. It was beautiful. It was human.

One day he could have sworn that he had seen a ghost on the tube. The glass reflections could often play tricks on your mind or even on those days where he was less observant of his peripherals. However, this person wasn’t just ordinary. He knew this because he could see the gentleman carrying his large beefeater hat on his lap. He’d never seen a Royal guard out in the ordinary world. They only appeared in spaces deemed important by the powers that be. They were signifiers of a pre-colonial world, where buildings made from expensive stone were regarded as worthy of protection. Who were they protecting them from? And if the buildings were recognised as such by the public, then surely there would be no need for their protection. It was almost an ironic reminder he had thought. Or he could have been completely wrong and that they were simply there for the visiting tourists. A photo opportunity? a map guide perhaps? an expensive one at that, not to mention useless seeing as though they weren’t allowed to speak. I suppose it all made sense, if they did speak then the whole mystery of the old world would shatter.

The agency of Buckingham Palace lay in the fact that it was untouchable, observant from the outside but never to be step foot in. It was like a grandparent that you could wave at from their drive, they would occasionally smile back, but that was the extent of your relationship. They didn’t hand you a tin of biscuits after a day at school, they never tucked you into bed at night or read you a book till you fell asleep, yet you still loved them regardless. It never made sense to him.

Had a giant Garden Gnome replaced Buckingham Palace, as long as all the pageantry and the ceremony of the Royal Guards carried on, people would still flock from all corners of the world just for a glimpse. It would also mean the red hat that sat on the Gnomes head was simply that, a hat. Not a collection of stolen symbols.

“[T]he heraldry of youth, long grown old” – Fiona Mozley

Check out my other London fictional piece here!

July Poetry: Underfoot

I hope to see the hills.
I hope to see rolling hills.
Ones that seemingly never end.
Ones that I can't find 
the words to describe. 
I know there exists 
such feats of nature out there.
I've seen it with my two eyes.
Where the land has been untouched by the ignorance of man.
Where I feel lost to time.
Yet cannot seem to spend enough of,
round these mountains that wind.
I felt the hills below me,
Undulating,
Without sin,
Innocent as the cries of a new born child.
I felt all that and more,
Simply under my feet.
What more could I have gauged had I lay down,
Peering into the blue skies above 
With an empty stare.
It is there that I know what it is to be human,
Where things made sense.
I hope to see the hills again.
I hope to see them rolling. 

Check out my last poem here

June Poetry: An Upset Uber Ride

I cried in an Uber once.
It seems silly thinking about it now. 
To be honest it was years ago.
I probably wouldn’t do the same anymore 
Or so I’d like to think.
Why didn’t I just walk home?
It would have taken about an hour,
roaming the streets of Bristol
In the dark didn’t usually scare me.
Why the quick journey home?
Subconciously my mind was looking out
for me I suppose,
street lights and emotional instability
aren’t often the best of combinations, 
unlike a glass of lemonade on a 
hot summer’s day.
Maybe a glass of lemonade would have 
solved all my problems?
They do say ‘when life gives you lemons …’
Nonetheless I ended up in a strangers car,
One I pair for funnily enough.
He noticed I was leaking water from my eyes,
‘Everything okay?’ he asked softly.
‘Not exactly’ I replied.
‘Don’t worry, everything will be alright’
A slight chuckle finishing off his sentence.
I always remembered this moment,
Almost three years later.
That is the most vivid memory of that night.
It is almost as if he’d seen this 
exact thing before,
whether or not he,
the uber driver
had lived this feeling out himself
or that he had been through 
the same experience with this previous 
customer.
Or perhaps he only picked up those 
who needed consoling?
I wouldn’t have been surprised,
not only was his driving smooth
but so was his demeanor.
I remember getting out the car,
feeling cured,
less leaky from the eyes 
and more present in the moment.
The confined space of the car 
forced our two opposing
energies to balance out.
		I can’t remember his name,
I wish I could.
Whoever you are I’d like to thank you.
To tell you that what you said was true,
Everything will be alright.
So the next time,
(if there is a next time),
I’m crying in an uber,
I will say those very words
to my future self.
A self that once again has forgotten
how	alright everything is.

Check out my last poem here!

Nike Server’s & Vibram’s – ‘Repair If You Care’ Event

My friend Max once wore his Air Max 95 ‘Chilis’ into work. They hadn’t been worn for a while, so unfortunately like a lot of older Nike shoes, they began to crumble. Scraping away the left foot’s midsole into the bin, he looked at them with a sense of loss. He was about to throw them away till I asked, “Can I have them if you’re just going to chuck them?” to which he replied, “Yeah sound”. A standard reply in the halls of shoe retail.

I had them tucked away in my cupboard in a JD string bag, hoping I could do a sole swap when I had the time. I took them back home a few months later, tinkering with them in the shed. I managed to get some more of the midsole off, but the shoe still looked worse-for-wear. They took a place next to my Air Max 2003s which I had bought off Depop back in 2016. They too had suffered the same fate as they started falling apart when I was at the gym. There they sat, two Nike shoes out of action. Hunched over on the benches, awaiting the day where the Coach would call them back into play. I hadn’t had much experience with shoe restoration, having partly reglued the soles of a pair of Jordan 14’s and a pair of Ice Cream Boardflip 2’s that I de-soled and took down to the local cobbler. I could manage the removal part of process, yet needed to improve my fixing portion. Quite metaphorical if I do say so myself, luckily this short piece is about shoes and not a tell-all though.  

I was scrolling my IG feed when I had seen Nike Server doing an event at the Vibram London Academy. It sounded perfect, an opportunity to bring back to life two previously retired Nikes. The sustainability hashtags were about to go off. It was a three-day event running from the Thursday till the Saturday and having the time to kill, I went up on the first day.

This was a pair I’d never seen before. Someone told me the name but annoyingly I can’t remember!
Selection of shoes for repair on the first day of the event. Peep the waffle’s in that OG colourway

Arriving at Waterloo, I then grabbed the tube to Old Street. It wasn’t a part of London I was familiar with having never spent a night dancing my socks off at XOYO, so thank goodness for 21st century tech. I arrived at the shop where it seemed relatively busy. I whipped out the shoes and began discussing with Mr Nike Server himself which midsoles would work best with which shoe. I opted with going for the larger yellow midsole for the Chilis, thinking the contrasting yellow and red would work well. Then for the 2003s, I went for a slightly less in-your-face cup soles in order to cover up the glue markings. Having not realised that the shoes would be fixed and ready to go the same day, I handed the shoes over to the team behind the counter. It cost £45 a pair which I thought was reasonably and would eventually go onto find out was a solid price compared to the usual £70 for a midsole repair. You can’t put a price on sustainability though, right?

“Should be about 6 weeks mate”, the London-sounding Vibram cobbler announced as the payment went through. I walked out the shop, two shoes down but eager to see what the result would be. It wouldn’t be till around 7 weeks later that I would find out. Having followed the Vibram London Academy on IG I did get a glimpse at my pair of Air Max 2003’s as it had been uploaded with a selection of other shoes. A few days later I received a text saying:

I headed up the Wednesday, feeling like I was about to be reunited with an old flame. Sad? Possibly but being into creps isn’t always glitz and glamour, more time it’s just a bunch of people who are enthusiastic about a piece of cloth glued to rubber. If you really want to boil it down to its essence, but where’s the romance in that. I thought of it more as two pieces of iconic design, hidden in the shadows awaiting the day to once again rest between foot and concrete, roaming the streets of this diverse, beautiful world.

The selection of Five Fingers in store

As I made it back to Old Street Tube station, my phone remained in pocket as I was now more familiar with the area. It was humidly-hot that day, the London streets bright and colourful with an array of sun dresses coupled with shades. Seeing the yellow Vibram store logo up ahead, I was merely few steps away from finally seeing the shoes in person. As I stepped in, the team seemed to be in better spirits this time. Perhaps it was the combination of the blue skies and the fact they weren’t swamped with youths bringing in their beaten-up trainers. They received a total of 94 pairs from that event if I remember correctly. That’s a lot of new hybrid Vibram’s walking about the pavements and a whole lot more shoes rescued from landfill. That works out to about 30 odd pairs each day during the event, that’s no small feat.

the 95 Hybrid’s fresh out the shop
The shoe sits perfectly on the rolling gait midsole

Whilst they looked for my two pairs, I took a browse at their Five Finger selection. I’d been looking at getting a pair of minimal footwear since hearing about the barefoot running movement a year before. What better time to try a pair on than in the London store itself. I tried a selection on making sure that they fit correctly. Putting on the V-train 2.0s after the more minimal indoor/gym iteration, I knew this one would last a whole lot longer due to the heavier tread pattern and more rugged upper. This would also leave the door open for any possible future trail runs. They were a long step away from my Salomon Speedcross 4’s, but would be a great way of building up foot and ankle strength.

my bad boy five fingers that keep low to the ground but that ground feel high

Having now worn them for a week at the gym, I can truly say these have been one of, if not my best gym shoe to date. No longer do I have to walk around in my socks or some overly cushioned trainers. Ground-feel is what everyone should be after when weight training at the gym and these certainly provide enough of that. As someone who’s into creps, it also veers round the issue of having to wear your gym shoes on the journey to, as the five fingers are easily packable. If only I had known this a few years ago, it would have saved me spending half of my retail life walking around in my Pegasus 38 Gore-Tex editions. A great shoe however, one that deserved some rest from my average 13K steps a day.

Overall, the event and the shoes were a success. I ended up with two unique Nike trainers and a pair of minimal footwear shoes. Collecting the shoes also gave me a reason to travel on the Elizabeth line which was great experience in and of itself. If you know me, I’m all about good experiences. Would I recommend the re-soling process to a friend, most definitely!

The 95 in the Elizabeth Line tube tunnel
The new Elizabeth seat design providing a great backdrop to highlight the 03’s

June Poetry: a gust of thought

Fleeting,
often times my creativity
is there one second 
and gone 
the next.
You follow the fluttering wings 
of a butterfly 
and try to capture it 
in your small, youthful hands 
only to open them and find
it’s not there.
Did it ever exist?
The question floats off
much like the butterfly.
If it was even real.
You stick your tongue out
pulling your waterproof hood back
as you do so,
finding a lack of water droplets 
available to bounce off the 
edges of your lips,
opening your eyes you see the 
sun shining bright unlike it
was just a minute ago.
	These quick changes of state 
happen all the time,
forever around you.
Who are you to criticize 
the direction of the wind?
merely adapt,
embrace this change of direction 
and of thought
or cease to exist
in a world full of
life
and 
creativity. 
With each face of the mind,
make sure you look it in the eye,
no matter how quick its glance.

Click here for my last poem